Gingrich Launchs New Sitcom
Fox announces ‘My Three Wives’ for Prime Time Slot
New York | In an homage to the beloved baby boomer series “My Three Sons,” the Fox Network, in conjunction with Gingrich Productions, has announced an updated version entitled “My Three Wives,” based on Newt Gingrich’s marital misadventures and hijinks.
Fox News Corporation CEO James Murdoch broke the news about the sitcom as he was running from his limo to a courtroom to again deny his involvement in the phone hacking scandal.
“My Three Wives will have everything that makes Fox the leading right-wing network: misinformation, vulgarity, character assassination, and plenty of laughs for the whole family,” he called out to reporters trailing behind him. “We will prove once and for all that Republicans do have a sense of humor!”
This reporter was able to get an advance copy of synopses of the first three episodes.
See You Later, Alligator!
Newt comes home from a hard day of serving the country he loves so much to find his two young daughters crying. They tell him Mom #1 has asked Newt to rush to her side at the hospital. They fear the worst! Imagine his disappointment when he finds out that instead of having terminal cancer, she only has a benign tumor! Deciding to go her one better, he tells her he doesn’t want to be married to a sick person and is divorcing her. Hilarity ensues!
Moving On Up!
After a hard day of issuing statements about President Clinton abusing the sanctity of marriage, Newt comes home to tell Mom #2 that he’s been having an affair with a blonde bombshell twenty years younger than he is. Tears turn to laughter when he tells Mom #2 that Callista doesn’t mind sharing him in an open marriage. In a tender moment, Newt surprises his daughters when he introduces them to his new “friend,” who is younger than they are! Imagine their surprise when they find out that the woman they thought was a new “sister” is actually boinking their Dad! Hilarity ensues!
After a hard day of collecting lobbying checks to cash in on the country he loves so much, Newt takes Mom #3 out for a drink at a Washington watering hole. While Newt is schmoozing fellow lobbyists at the bar, a miffed Callista impishly slips three Viagras into his martini! After he finishes his drink, they walk over to the grounds of the Washington Monument where she murmurs into his ear, “Baby, feels like you’re packing a Washington Monument of your own tonight.” As they start to make love, a Park policeman shines a flashlight on them, kicking off a rollicking, laugh-filled chase that winds up in the Georgetown University Hospital Emergency Room with Newt trying to explain how he got his 12-hour erection. Hilarity ensues!